Cats are fascinating creatures. They retain so much of their wild hunting abilities and instincts while being fully domesticated. They are incredible athletes and remarkable gymnasts. I admire them as creations of God. BUT, they do make your house smell awful. The do make my wife, dad, and many others unable to breath in a matter of minutes. And they have that nasty habit of treating their owners like pets instead of the other way around. I would NEVER willingly own a cat.

All that said, they still entertain me.

If you haven’t heard of LOLCATZ (For the clueless, that’s pronounced “lole-cats.”), what rock have you been living under?

I love the lolcat site I CAN HAZ CHEEZBURGER. Not every post makes me laugh, but many do. They are purrrfect (aha…) bite-sized humor kibbles for when I’m working hard, but have to wait a couple of minutes for a build or a script to finish (like right now, for instance).

With my proclivity for naps, this one really got me giggling.

Join me today in raising a 7-layer burrito in memory of Gidget, the Taco Bell Chihuahua. Gidget died yesterday at the age of 105 (in dog years). I know there’s some controversy over the discovery that Gidget was a female. But I’m willing to look beyond the tabloid sex scandals and just remember the good times.

My favorite was the Godzilla movie cross-promo where Gidget sat next to a box trap baited with tacos. “Heeeere leezard leezard leezard!” What’s yours?

I really like David Crowder Band. I really like internet memes. I really like Twitter (but I’m not addicted). I really really LOVE this video!! (And yes, I’m going to tweet it too.)

Considering that today is Embrace Your Geekness Day, what better time could there be for me to share my personal treatise on three oft confused terms.

Many people use these three terms interchangeably and, as someone who considers himself a geek, but not a nerd or dork, this is highly offensive. Allow me to expound.

Geek, nerd, and dork are titles that, while related, refer to different ends of a large spectrum. Yes, a spectrum! Like a rainbow of social ineptitude.

At the low end, you have the ineffectual dork. The dork has little or no social grace, making them uncomfortable company for even the shortest period of time. They have no concept of what normal people think is funny or even interesting. They tend to be loud and sometimes even rude. Many of them fail grasp basic grooming. (Your greasy mullet and mutton chops do not make you look like Wolverine. They make you look homeless.)

Dorks also have no marketable skills, making them useless to society. Notice I used “marketable.” Neither speaking fluent Klingon nor “pwning noobs” in Halo are “marketable.” (No one is going to call you up offering to pay you to pwn their noobs for them.)

If you move up the scale on the skills side, you will find the humble nerd. These poor souls toil in the background of our society, inventing and inovating, making our lives better, but never reaping the benefits. Even if the make a billion dollars, no one wants to come to their parties and hang out. (Reference Bill Gates!) These are the guys that multiple PhDs and are still taking night classes, not because they need to, but because they would rather spend Friday night doing homework that face the cruel social gauntlet of real life.

At the top of the spectrum you have the mighty geek. Thanks to the nerds of the past, on who’s shoulders we stand, geeks are able to master marketable skills and still have time to make friends, date and marry attractive women, and carry on successful lives away from the keyboard.

You’ll notice a conspicuous missing label from my graph. It is reserved for those of whom we geeks prefer not to speak. Those with no skills, but lots of schmooze. Out from this black hole of humanity crawl middle managers, politicians, sales and marketing. Necessary? Perhaps. Desirable? May it never be so.

In honor of  Embrace Your Geekness Day, this week’s quip is surfeit with geekitude.

There are 10 kinds of people in the world: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.